Challenges and Choices
by MagicalFish
Summary: When a friend errs in battle, another pays dearly. Shinon has to decide just much longer he can hold on to a love thought unrequited. Final pairing Shinon/Rhys, one-sided Shinon/Gatrie
1. Chapter 1

Hello, readers-it's me again with a new story. I haven't written fanfiction in a while, but with my latest obsession with RD, I thought I'd give it a shot.

So, this story-it will be a continuing story, and I'm not sure what the ultimate pairing will be-Either Shinon/Gatrie or Shinon/Rhys. Vote if you like. It contains violence, so be forewarned if you're squeamish.

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Shinon drummed his fingers on the wooden tabletop, trying to tune out Gatrie's incessant praise of the newest woman he had found. The din of the mercenary's mess hall at mealtime was not enough to drown out the garrulous knight.

"And Shana's hair is longer than Soren's, and prettier too!" Gatrie crowed triumphantly.

Shinon raised a thin eyebrow at the idea that the dowdy mage's hair could be pretty, and replied in a bored drawl. "Oh really."

Gatrie did not pick up on the tone, or if he did he did not care one whit about it. "Yep! And her eyes are green like yours, Shinon, and she has the softest skin"-

Shinon cut him off there, deciding to take the direct approach. "Gatrie, have I ever given a shit about your goddessdamned women?" He realized he was letting his true anger show, and regretted it. Soren flashed him a glare from another table as Ike covered Mist's ears, and Shinon just rolled his eyes. Where had the mage been when Gatrie had been calling his hair pretty?

Gatrie kept his constant smile. "Aw, Shinon, but this one is special! She says she likes me, and she's from the town nearby!"

Shinon sighed. "You see, Gatrie," he began as though talking to a child, "whores say they like all sorts of men.."

"She's not a whore!" Gatrie yelled, his raised voice carrying well over the noise of the room. Boyd laughed, and Shinon distinctly heard Rolf ask "Oscar, what's a whore?" The sniper put his his head in his hands and hoped he didn't have to end up explaining that one.

"She's not!" Gatrie was oblivious to the awkward silence he had just created. "Why do you call all of my girls whores, Shinon?" He almost sounded hurt. Shinon didn't care at the moment.

The sniper looked up and gave his friend an incredulous look. "Gatrie, are you honestly that dense? Remember that girl during the war? The one who took all your money?"

"But this one is different!"

"Keep telling yourself that." Shinon replied, kicking back his chair as he stood up. He didn't want to deal with Gatrie any longer at the moment. How did a man this stupid worm his way into my esteem? Shinon thought to himself as he went outside into the archery range. And why do I want him so badly?

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Target practice was one of the best ways to work off frustration. Shinon had discovered this soon after meeting Gatrie, who had initially insisted on practicing without wearing his armor. Target shooting kept Shinon's focus straight ahead, and occupied his mind, distracting him from the sight of the sun shining off a certain man's well muscled biceps. Of course, they didn't practice together anymore. Not since Gatrie kept "discovering" loose women to run around with...

The arrow hit the target with a satisfying "thock." Dead center. As usual. Shinon wished Gatrie's woman were the target.

It grew dark as Shinon continued training, but the red haired man did not let up the intensity of his practice. He did not want to think about Gatrie. Not about his stupid infatuations, or his stupid blue eyes, or his strong arms, his sinewy thighs...

Desire flashed through the sniper suddenly, and he grit his teeth against it. Such fantasies had their time and place, but not now. He was not a pining woman, he didn't need Gatrie! In anger, he shot the target again, drawing the string back farther than he thought and twisting his elbow. The bow twanged, the arrow flew drunkenly off center into the grass, and the string snapped against the sniper's forearm. Sharp pain blossomed instantly from the impact, crawling up to his neck.

"Goddess DAMN it!" He swore, stifling the reflexive urge to rub his arm. He was thankful Rolf hadn't been there to see his master make such an amateurish mistake. And all for some knight who was too dumb to realize when he was being taken advantage of by a pair of tits...

Shinon heard hoofbeats, and turned to see Titania galloping toward the mercenary base. Her disheveled braid flew behind her, and her horse was lathered. Shinon frowned. Hadn't she had some assignment? Not that he paid close attention to little Ike's demands for others. Or for himself.

The paladin met his gaze, and continued riding up to the front door, dismounting quickly. Shinon raised his eyebrows. Something was obviously up.

"Could be work, for a change." He muttered to himself. He gathered up his things and headed inside, thoughts of Gatrie temporarily pushed to the back of his mind.

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He walked inside just in time to hear Titania screech. "Bandits! The town is overrun!" So there was work then.

The only two people in the mess were Boyd and Mia, and they both snapped to attention. "I'll get Ike!" Mia exclaimed. She had barely spoken when the blue haired boy appeared, Soren and Mist in tow.

"Bandits?" Ike asked.

"The town of Stonecart." Titania explained. "They've had raids before, but not like this one." As she spoke, Oscar, Rolf, and Gatrie came down the stairs.

"Bandits? In Shana's town?!" Gatrie yelled, worried.

Shinon practically snarled. Of course. "If they're overrun, how can we expect to get paid?" The sniper spoke coolly. "We're mercenaries, remember? Where's the money in this?" Shinon actually saw Soren nod, and mentally kicked himself for inadvertently taking the mage's side.

Titania rounded on him. "They've killed children!"

Shinon shut his mouth. He couldn't argue against that.

"A town in our debt could be beneficial." Soren said, obviously his way of agreeing with taking action. "How many are there?"

"It was hard to count them all. At least fifty." Titania was losing energy, and Mia grabbed the older woman a chair. She sat down thankfully. "If we leave tonight, we could give them aid by tomorrow morning."

"Won't that be too late?" Oscar asked. Shinon agreed. How long had it taken Titania to get here anyway?

"The bandits are holding back and holding children prisoners to see if the town will surrender without fighting. The villagers won't have it, of course. We have until the morning before they try to fight on their own." Shinon frowned. Of course it was something like this. What idiotic pride.

"Greil Mercenaries." Ike spoke up. "Tonight we are heading for the town of Stonecart. Tomorrow, we will defend it. Move!"

Shinon gave no outward sign he had heard the order. He simply headed up to collect his weapons, grimacing as the rest of the group cheered their commander's decision.

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The night lay heavy on the mercenaries as they moved towards Stonecart. The tall sniper had to alternate between rushing forward and ducking under low branches and waiting impatiently for his friend to catch up. The armored knight was slower than Rhys, for Goddessake!

"Hold!" Ike shouted over the sound of ten people pacing through the forest. "Rest for a few moments." Shinon immediately plopped down where he stood, quickly checking his bow and quiver. He gave a nod of acknowledgement to Rolf, who was doing the same. Oscar dismounted and began rubbing down his horse, fixing the armored plating on the horses's face.

A horrendous clang sounded in Shinon's ears, and he turned to see Gatrie, who wheezed next to him, leaning on his spear. "Hah...how long's it been, Shinon?"

"Almost five hours." The sniper returned curtly. "You're holding us up."

"Am not!" Gatrie protested. "I'm only ever a little bit behind, not enough to matter. It's the armor!"

"If you'd train the way you used to instead of going off after women, you wouldn't have that problem." Shinon let bitterness creep into his voice, and he regretted it as soon as he finished speaking. Why had he been losing control of himself lately?

"Hah ha! I do train, Shinon! Just not the same time you do." The sniper looked away from the knight, hoping Gatrie couldn't see his expression. "If you wore armor all the time, you'd get tired too, you know." Gatrie concluded proudly.

"I'm sure." Shinon answered tonelessly.

"Um, excuse me?" Rhys hovered over where the two men sat, holding out an item-a vulnerary. "You two should take these. You might need them." The healer's soft voice was barely audible.

"I'll take them!" Gatrie said, grinning. "Don't worry, Shinon, if you need any during the battle, just ask! I'm always there for you!"

Shinon narrowed his eyes. "I don't need your help!" He snapped, a little too nastily. Rhys nearly dropped the vulnerary in surprise.

"Sure, Shinon, I'm sorry. I know." Gatrie didn't miss a beat, seemingly unperturbed his friend's outburst.

Calm down! Shinon told himself. It was not a good idea to let his anger at his friend bleed into the battle. No matter how Goddessdamned oblivious he was. Shinon didn't know half the time whether he wanted to screw him or just kill him.

"So, here you go." Rhys handed the vulnerary to Gatrie, studying Shinon with concern. The sniper just glared back, daring the bishop to say something. Gatrie, meanwhile, happily stuffed the vulnerary into his pack.

"Alright, let's get going!" Ike shouted from afar, breaking the odd staring match. The sniper leapt to his feet, pointedly ignoring Rhys. What did that idiot Bishop want anyway? Did he look sick or something? Putting it out of his mind, Shinon began to jog forward, smiling to himself as he heard Gatrie clanking along behind him.

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"Do you think Shana will be all right?" Gatrie whispered in Shinon's ear as they surveyed the town in the dawn light. Goosebumps formed on Shinon's neck in response, and he waved Gatrie away.

"How should I know?"

"Well, you can see better, so I thought..."

"Ssh!" Soren practically hissed at them. "Listen..."

The mage outlined his plan. Oscar and Titania would ride ahead, drawing the bandit's attention. As they were pursued, Ike, Mia and Gatrie would move up in separate groups to attack. Rolf, Soren and Mist would accompany Ike, Shinon would accompany Gatrie, and Rhys would go with Mia. It sounded fine to Shinon, as long as he got paid.

Oscar and Titania galloped out, both paladins whooping and waving their weapons. Sure enough, a good number of the bandits abandoned the wall they had formed outside the town and began chasing the riders.

"Not smart, are they?" Shinon remarked.

"C'mon!" Gatrie twirled his spear and crashed through the bushes. Shinon exchanged glances with Rolf, who was hurriedly putting arrows in his spacer. Shinon nodded at the kid, hoping he would understand the message. Stay safe. Watch out for that idiot Ike. Well, maybe not so much the last part.

Shinon followed Gatrie, the nimble sniper moving far more silently than the charging knight. His soft leather shoes lent him stealth as he efficiently dispatched a bandit who had begun to swing at Gatrie. He didn't even see the man go down, falling into the battle mind that was so life saving in these situations. The scent of wet leaves and blood, and sound of screams in the distance, footsteps-

Shinon whirled and nocked the bow, barely seeing the man as his thin fingers let the arrow fly. A slight puff of wind by his ear told him that the arrow had flown true, and the wet crunch, so different from the sound of practice, told him that the bandit would not be following.

"Hurry, Shinon!" Gatrie's voice caught him, and the knight moved forward. He was so easy to follow, the clanking mixing with the snapping of twigs under his feet. Smashed leaves, red with autumn and blood, marked his passing. "Oof!"

An axe clanged on Gatrie's shield, and Gatrie did not even buckle. The knight lunged powerfully, and Shinon was treated to a flash of deliciously muscled thighs, as Gatrie drove his spear through the shoulder of the bandit. The enemy fell to his knees, still clutching his axe as blood rained from the wound. Shinon, far more accurate, took him down the rest of the way.

The battle went on, and Shinon's callused fingers hummed pleasantly from the repeated pulling of the bow string and the adrenaline running through his veins. Their path was littered with bodies, and neither of them had suffered from any more than fatigue. The battle was nearly won.

"Shinon!" Gatrie's panicked voice broke the sniper's concentration, and he lowered his bow, hurrying to the knights side.

"What?" The knight was obviously not wounded.

"It's Shana!" Gatrie pointed a gauntleted hand through the trees. Shinon could see a dark haired woman standing alone, next to an incredibly hairy man holding a swordbreaker. The man held her pressed close to him, but she didn't look overly concerned. "I have to help her!"

"Gatrie, I don't think needs any." Shinon growled. Whore indeed.

"No, I have to! Stay here, if you want, but I have to go!"

"Wait, you moron!" Too late. Gatrie continued his charge, veering in the direction of the scene. Shinon cursed, then cursed again.

"Fuck! Goddessdamned moron! He's going to get killed for some stupid woman!" Shinon hefted his bow, ready to follow, then paused as he heard the subtle sound of a crackling leaf.

He didn't turn in time to meet the axe as it slashed through his arm, opening a gash that exposed bone. His stomach flipped as he saw the two bandits, one with an axe, one with a lance. The pain hit him them, and he saw yellow lights until he remembered to breathe. Blood soaked his shirt and dripped through the cloth. They were too close.

The lanceman caught him in the chest, a jab that cut straight through his leather tunic and into his lung. Shinon coughed and crumpled to the ground, the pain so deep that it burned. Every breath brought agony, and a coughing fit that brought up warm liquid to stain his chin and shirt. He rolled onto his side, and his body convulsed, blood spraying the leaves.

Where was Rhys? He needed healing. Rhys always healed him before. A vulnerary! No, Gatrie had them...Gatrie. Gatrie had left. He had gone to Shana.

He tried to position himself to ease the pain, so he could think straight, and realized he was writhing. People did that when he shot them, before they died. He fell suddenly still, breath coming in shallow gasps. He stared straight ahead, at a tree trunk with dark marks at it's base. Someone had built a fire there before.

Darkness passed over him, and footsteps receded. Where was Gatrie? Why had he left him? Shinon hurt. He hurt so badly.

"Ga..." He coughed, and felt wet warmth on his lips. "Gatrie!" His voice was breathy, not loud enough. The world went dark.

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TBC

Review please.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2. Not much "Action," so to speak, but necessary nonetheless. I still don't know what the ultimate pairing will be, so keep voting.

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Blue light. It streamed through his eyelids, and suddenly he could breath again. He heard his chest rattle, and the pain returned, twisting his body as he coughed. He tried to bring his hand up, to block...something, he didn't know what. There were people around him, and he didn't want to open his eyes.

"The vulnerary, the vulnerary, give it to him!" His hoarse, wracking coughs made it hard to hear the soft female voice. Was it Mist?

"Shinon, just hold still." Someone held him, gripping his shoulders and head as he coughed. The coughing hurt less when they did that. He opened his eyes, and Gatrie, silhouetted in the sun's light, peered down at him. His eyes seemed...bluer than usual. "Haha, he's awake!"

By the Goddess, did his chest hurt. He couldn't stop coughing. Gatrie's face frayed around the edges.

"Hurry and make him drink it!" Something was put to his lips, and he wanted to tell Mist to shut her damn mouth and let him die in peace. Then he swallowed the vulnerary. It tasted like mint and cream.

The pain went from a sharp stab to a dull ache, and he coughed with less urgency. He still couldn't stop, though, and his mouth tasted like blood. It gagged him. He rolled over and vomited onto the leaves, someone holding on to his hair. Probably Gatrie. Damn him...Shinon closed his eyes, wishing the taste of blood would go away. Gatrie lifted him up and cradled him, Shinon sensing the strength in the knight's powerful arms. Gatrie had never held him before...

"Shinon! Are you alright? Talk to me!" Shinon didn't want to open his eyes. He didn't want to think. He felt so tired. At least the coughing had stopped, although his throat still tickled, and his chest felt tight.

"What's wrong with him?!" Gatrie's panicked voice rang in his ears. "The staffs and vulneraries are supposed to work!"

"I...I'm not sure." Mist answered. Her voice faded as Shinon gave in to unconsciousness. "He..lot...blood."

The next thing to wake him was the sensation of being dropped. He fell, and panic gripped him until he realized that he was cocooned in a large sheet. He opened his eyes, and looked up to see two horses, and two riders. He lay between Oscar and Titania. He moved a hand, seemingly through air thicker than syrup, as if to ask what they thought they were doing.

"We're taking you to the town." Oscar smiled down at him kindly. "Rhys can tend you there, as he hurt his leg during the fight. The ride won't be long."

Shinon wanted to curse at the paladin for talking to him like he was a child, but the fatigue was too intense. His entire body felt like lead, and he barely felt the motions of the horses as they made their way through the woods. He hoped Gatrie followed.

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"Shinon." A soft masculine voice prodded him awake. The first sensation to return was touch, and the ground-no, bed-under him was unbelievably soft, far softer than his bunk at the compound. He heard no birds singing, no crunching of leaves...he was safe here.

"Shinon, I'd like you to open your eyes." Rhys asked him.

"Go screw yourself." Shinon answered. He wanted to sleep.

"Well, he's fine." Soren said from somewhere. Someone put a cool hand to his neck, and Shinon slapped it away, finally opening his eyes and giving the healer what he hoped was an angry glare.

Rhys drew his hand back, frowning at the archer and rubbing his wrist. "How are you feeling?"

Shinon's head hurt, he was tired, and he was thirstier than he had ever been in his life. "Fine." He replied, his mouth dry as cotton.

"Good, then you can explain how you were injured." Soren walked up to the bed, a quill and paper in hand. "Because if you followed my instructions, you shouldn't have been." Rhys looked askance at Soren, and then left the room.

Questions of where he was and how long he had been asleep were replaced with anger at the mage's tone. "Maybe you underestimated the enemy. Wasn't Rhys hurt as well?"

Soren narrowed his eyes. "He didn't skirt death. Now, how were you hurt?"

Shinon sat up straighter in bed, doing his best to keep his gaze on Soren as a wave of dizziness hit him. "I was hit with a lance." He smirked.

Soren wrote something down, not rising to the bait. "Maybe I'll ask Gatrie."

Shinon swallowed hard. The mage couldn't know. Gatrie had left him to die. Anger warred with sadness and shame. Gatrie hadn't meant it, of course. Of course not. Shinon wanted his friendship if he couldn't have him, but women...they stood in the way of that too. Damn them. Damn him! Shinon leaned back on the pillows, the dizziness returning, and closed his eyes. A friend who couldn't even stay by his side in battle wasn't worthy of defending, but he simply couldn't report Gatre's ineptitude to the tactician. It would make the betrayal too...real. Gatrie couldn't help not caring, and that hurt most. But, the knight had held him so tenderly...

"Shinon?" Soren asked, his normal monotone broken by what could have been concern. "Are you awake?"

"Take this." He opened his eyes again to see Rhys holding out a glass of water. "You probably need it." When the archer grabbed it and drank it in seconds, the healer smiled knowingly. "You lost a lot of blood, you know. You've been asleep for a full day." Shinon blinked and handed the empty cup back to the bishop, not letting his surprise show.

"Hmph. I'll be by later. And we're leaving in the afternoon, so get strength to travel." Soren left without any further words. Shinon just lay back and closed his eyes.

"That's his way of giving you a rest." Rhys offered. Shinon didn't respond.

"Um..." What did the Goddessdamned man want? "I'm sorry I wasn't there when you were hurt." The sniper's eyes flew open incredulously.

"What?"

"It was risky, Soren knew that. That's why I gave Gatrie the vulnerary..."

"Where is Gatrie?!" The sniper almost shouted, interrupting Rhys's tiring little speech. Shinon stopped caring about Rhys's misplaced guilt. Why hadn't his friend come to visit? Rolf he understood, he had told the boy to keep the training quiet, but Gatrie...the knight was all he had.

"Oh...Ike ordered him back to base. He was depressed, with you hurt and-Hey!"

Shinon threw back the covers and tried to storm out of bed, snarling. "That idiot pup!" He didn't get far before the room whirled around him and he fell, his knee hitting the wooden floor hard. "Damn..."

"Oh, be careful!" Rhys put a soft hand on Shinon's arm, and the sniper let himself lean on the bishop as he got to his feet. Amazingly, the healer did not get bowled over by the weight. "C'mon, you need more rest."

Shinon tolerated Rhys's touch until he was on the bed before shoving the man's hand away. Rhys's hands were very soft, though. Shinon tried to focus. "He sent Gatrie back alone?!"

"No, no...Rolf, Boyd, Mist and Mia went as well. The rest of us stayed behind to help you."

"I don't need any help." Shinon pretended he had not just nearly fallen on his face. "Where is here, anyway?"

"Stonecart. Because of our help, they let us use this house to tend our wounded." Rhys smiled at him, and Shinon looked away.

"Was anyone else hurt?"

"Boyd suffered a scratch or two, and my leg...no one as badly as you." Shinon bristled, but Rhys had not meant it as an insult. "What happened, Shinon?" The healer lost his smile. "If Mist had found you one second later...You must have lain there for almost an hour before she did. Why did you go off on your own?"

Shinon ignored him, rolling over and staring at the far wall. Typical townhouse, he thought. The room was sparse, but cozy. They had painted the walls white, but the sun coming in the window brightened it and made it look more natural. There was a bookshelf, and the sniper's sharp eyes out could make out some of the titles. "History of Tellius." "Penmanship." A particularly thick book on etiquette. Whose house was this? He hadn't known villagers could read.

"Shinon..." Why wouldn't Rhys leave him be? "If something happened, I should know." Yeah, right. So he could report it straight to Ike. "Did you feel ill?" He lowered his voice. "Had you been drinking? I know you have...issues with alcohol sometimes."

Shinon grit his teeth and kept his silence while his thoughts chased each other in circles. He wished he could talk to Gatrie. The knight would smile and nod, and apologize. And Shinon would have no guarantee it wouldn't happen again. He sighed. Gatrie was an idiot when it came to women. He always would be. No amount of wishing would change that. No amount of fooling himself would change the fact that Gatrie had left him in danger, had nearly gotten him killed, while the knight chased some whore. Shinon knew that. Had Gatrie realized the danger? Shinon wished he hadn't. If Gatrie had known Shinon would be attacked, and suspected Shana to be in danger...who would he have chosen to protect?

Not me, Shinon thought to himself. He didn't want to believe it. But he did.

A weight settled itself on the bed, and a hand was lain on his shoulder. His muscles tensed immediately, and he refused to look at Rhys. "Shinon, I do want to help you. Believe me." The bishop's voice was soft. "Your near death is no light matter. I just...I want to make sure that whatever caused it won't happen again." When Shinon still refused to speak, Rhys continued. "Rolf was very upset, you know."

Conniving, for a priest. "Stop touching me." Shinon hissed.

The hand left his shoulder, but the sniper could still feel the ghost of it's weight. He was rarely touched, and it had almost felt nice, even from Rhys. Not that the sniper would ever admit it.

Rhys didn't say anything for a long time, and Shinon wondered if the priest had finally gotten a clue until another glass of water was held in front of him. "You need to keep hydrated." Shinon braved sitting up again, drinking until the glass was empty. He actually felt better this time. At least, he did until he realized the damned priest was still staring at him.

"Gatrie was worried too." Shinon quickly looked away. "We all were! You're our companion, Shinon." Rhy had the audacity to touch his fingers to Shinon's chin, guiding the sniper to look at him. "You may think we don't care, but we'd all be devastated if you died."

The healer had barely finished his sentence before Shinon grabbed his arm, twisting it so that Rhys fell onto the floor. "I told you to stop touching me!" Why wouldn't the damned man shut up!? Gatrie didn't care, not enough to prevent it. Why would anyone else? Rolf might, but he was a child. He would have gotten over it. Shinon hated being lied too, especially about something so stupid.

"Shinon..." Rhys's face was flushed, and he rubbed his arm as he stood up. "Why are-"

"I DON'T CARE!" Shinon shouted, his voice echoing off the walls. The healer took a step back, a horribly sad expression on his face. It reminded him of how Rolf looked when he yelled at the kid too much, except on the face of an adult, it was doubly pathetic. Shinon stared at the bookshelf again, unwilling to acknowledge Rhys. He spotted another book, something about dogs. Dog Training.

"I take it from all the yelling that you're well enough to head back?" That was little Ike's voice. Shinon didn't move. Ike wasn't worth his time.

"Um, commander..." Rhys was unmistakably shaken. Well, good. "I'm...I'm not sure if...It's a whole day's hard walk, and..." Shinon realized the priest was trying to tell Ike to give him more time. Screw that. He swung his legs out of the bed, discreetly using the desk to steady himself as he stood up. He still faced the bookshelf, and could not see Ike. He felt dizzy only briefly, though there was a moment when he heard a strange roaring in his ears and his vision fuzzed yellow.

"You can ride, if you like." Ike spoke up. "The villagers were so grateful to us that they rewarded us with a horse."

Shinon turned around, making his expression unreadable. Soren must have been thrilled with that. What would they do with an extra horse? And how would that be split evenly among all of them? Shinon imagined eating a horse, and then quickly banished the thought.

"We'll be outside." Ike left then. Shinon wished that just once, the boy would challenge him in some way. Then Shinon could really prove who was superior. The coward never did, though.

Shinon walked towards the door, doing his to best ignore Rhys, who dutifully followed him. At least he kept his mouth shut this time. He was probably frightened of how the sniper would react, and Shinon was perversely pleased with that.

Oscar raised a hand in greeting when he came outside, and to his surprise a good number of the villagers smiled at him as well. They milled around, pressing gifts onto Ike and Soren, and stuffed flowers into the saddlebags of all three horses. Some of the girls even smiled at Shinon, and he simply glared back. It didn't seem to dissuade them from giggling at him and offering him useless trinkets like flowers and in one case, a comb. He refused to touch any of it, and focused on collecting his things. There wasn't much, besides his bow.

Despite having little experience with horses on a daily basis besides avoiding Oscar's, who liked to bite him when he came into the stables drunk, Shinon was able to get himself situated well enough on the horse. He would never be a good rider, but he noted that Titania and Oscar positioned themselves on either side of him should he fall. They also hooked their horses's bridles to his-apparently he didn't have to do any work. It should have galled him, but the sun beating down and the dry autumn air were making him thirsty and tired all over again. He didn't have the energy to complain.

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He spent most of the ride back in a daze, sleeping fitfully in the saddle. Conversation buzzed around him, and he heard Oscar laughing periodically at whatever Titania was saying. At one point someone gave him water, and he raised it to his lips and drank without even really acknowledging what it was until a few minutes after the fact. Finally, after what seemed like ages, Shinon recognized the area around him, and the mercenary compound came into view.

Titania and Oscar unhooked his horse, and Shinon came fully awake when he heard a high pitched voice. "Shinon!"

Rolf flung himself at the horse, and Shinon promptly slid off onto the ground with a thud that jarred his bones. The horse trotted a few feet away and began cropping grass, unaware of and uncaring of what had befallen it's rider. Stupid horse. Only then did the sniper realize how much his legs and hips hurt from riding the stupid beast for so long, and he muffled a curse.

"Uncle Shinon, Mist said you almost died!" Rolf told him in a whisper that was far too loud.

"Get away from me, brat." Shinon pushed Rolf away, and the boy looked at him tearfully. Shinon would have thumped the kid on the head for being so dramatic, but at the moment he couldn't quite stand up.

Oscar intervened, hoisting the sniper to his feet quickly. "You get used to it." He said, his ever present smile turned up more than usual. Shinon stumbled a bit on his feet before he got his balance back, the outside of his thighs aching abominably.

More of the mercenaries were coming outside to greet those returning, and Shinon quickly hurried towards the rear of the compound, hoping to get inside before he saw Gatrie. He couldn't face the knight in front of everyone. He heard Rolf trotting after him, and he turned around quickly, giving the kid the thump on the head that he deserved.

"Ouch! Uncle Shinon..."

"Not now." Shinon made himself sound less stressed than he was. "I need sleep, and for that I need quiet. Don't let anyone bother me." Rolf was the only person Shinon would ever admit a weakness like exhaustion too. He could be trusted. "Go back and...have fun or something." There would certainly be some celebrating once everyone had gotten settled.

"Will you be okay?" Rolf asked quietly.

"I'm fine." Shinon turned and left then, before anyone else could catch up to him. He didn't see Gatrie at all as he went up the stairs to his room, and was able to stop thinking about the knight when he fell asleep. Strangely enough, his last thought before falling asleep was of Rhys's soft voice, and even softer hands.

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TBC.

Criticism please! It helps me keep up my motivation, and tells me how I can improve my writing.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3. Making some progress. It looks more and more like it will eventually be Shinon/Rhys, but tables can be turned.

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The sound of knocking intruded upon his dreams, and Shinon turned over in bed, a brief vision of a familiar male form being replaced with the vastly less interesting picture of his pillow. The sniper placed said pillow over his head, hoping the offending person who stop knocking and let him sleep. His head hurt.

"Shinon?" It was Oscar's voice. "I've brought you some food from lunch." Lunch? What time was it? It had been near evening when they had returned...he had slept for longer than he thought. "Please open the door."

Grumbling, Shinon rolled out of bed, stumbling a bit as the act of standing up triggered bullets of pain to shoot through the sides of his scalp. With one hand occupied on holding his head, he pulled open the door halfway, and grabbed the tray from Oscar's hands without meeting his gaze. He then shut the door in the paladin's face, looking over the selection. Cheese, dried meat, and a thick soup filled with small leaves that smelled like soap. Was the man trying to poison him? At least there was water-Shinon drained the glass before beginning the meal. He had never tasted the soup before, and suspected it was a concoction overseen by Rhys in an attempt to heal him further. He appreciated the meat far more.

By the time he had finished eating, his head hurt less, and some of the residual weakness from the attack had faded. He told himself it was the food in general, and not Rhys's mysterious soap soup.

Shinon opened his window, letting light flood his tiny room. The day was well underway, and Shinon estimated it to be late afternoon. Looking down into the practice yard, Shinon saw Titania practicing throwing a javelin at a straw bale along with Boyd, who was throwing axes. Mist and Rolf were watching them as they talked with each other, and Rolf was eating a roll of some sort. Further into the yard, Ike was practicing with...Gatrie.

Gatrie wasn't wearing a shirt, and his legs were covered with a thin pair of white pants that clung to him as he sweated from the exertion of practice. Shinon's heart sped up as soon as he set eyes on the knight, ignoring the commander completely. Powerful muscles bunched under tanned skin as the man deftly spun his lance, blocking Ike's slashes. He then performed a slow stab, a powerfully graceful lunge, and Shinon's sharp eyes roamed over the delicately arched foot, the curve of the knight's calf, up to his thighs and perfectly chiseled abs. Shinon treated himself to a fantasy of what was underneath the light pants Gatrie wore, of how it would feel to have those strong legs straddling him...moving with him...

Shinon realized he was breathing hard, and painfully aroused. He tore his gaze away from the blond man, thankful that no one in the company had vision as good as his, or any reason to look up to Shinon's window. Why did Gatrie still torment him!? The knight would never feel for him the same way. Shinon could be certain of that now. The sniper worked on calming himself down, wishing he could go to the practice yard to relax and knowing he could not if Gatrie was there, tempting him unknowingly. At worst, the knight would be disgusted, at best...he wouldn't care. Gatrie would pity him.

A motion of green caught his attention, and Shinon saw Oscar walking toward the two men practicing. "Oh crap." Shinon spoke aloud, knowing the first person Oscar would inform of Shinon's condition would be Gatrie. And of course...The figures on the ground exchanged words, and Shinon fled from the window before the knight could look up. Could he run out of the compound before Gatrie came up? Would he come up? Shinon didn't know what would be worse, Gatrie ignoring him or visiting him with concern. The indecision paralyzed him, until he heard the knock at his door. That was one question answered. The other was whether or not he could make it out the window. He wasn't ready for this. He needed time to decide what to do!

"Shinon?" Gatrie's voice shattered Shinon's world of thought, leaving only emotion-raw anger, and intense shame.

"Come in." Shinon could barely perceive the voice as his.

The door swung open slowly, and Gatrie poked his head inside. Instead of his usual smile, he wore an almost frightened expression. "Shinon..."

He'll apologize. Shinon thought to himself. He's probably full of guilt.

"I'm sorry." Gatrie's voice was quiet, and almost inaudible. He closed the door behind him, staring at the doorknob as though it would save him. He had found a shirt somewhere, at least, though his body still distracted the archer. Of course, Shinon could not see his face...Shinon's throat tightened at the realization that the man could not even look at him. All he sees is the guilt, Shinon figured. He doesn't see me.

Shinon had dealt with that type of pain long enough. He knew how to deal with people who didn't want to deal with him. What, did Gatrie think he could just apologize and everything would be okay? Of course. Gatrie didn't think Shinon cared, about him or about anything. Shinon convinced himself of that, and convinced himself that Gatrie would never care. He would feel just as guilty if it had been anyone else. Shinon clenched his fists in anger. He was fucking sick of caring about a man who saw him as nothing special. He would hurt Gatrie the same way he hurt him.

"How's Shana?" Shinon suppressed a wince as he saw Gatrie's mouth turn down, and the archer focused on putting a smirk on his face. "You seemed awfully concerned about her."

"Shinon..." Gatrie looked up finally, and Shinon quickly transferred his gaze away from the man's piercing blue eyes. Emotional pain was evident in the way the knight held himself. Shinon didn't let himself care.

"What? You had to protect someone during the fight, right? If not me, then her."

"Shinon..." Gatrie almost whined his name. The sniper didn't answer. "You...were right about her. She...was with the bandits."

Shinon swallowed hard. So why didn't he come back? His thoughts raced again. Rhys said I laid there for an hour, and Mist found me! If Shana didn't need him, why didn't he come back!? Out loud, he spoke calmly. "I told you so."

"You're always right." Gatrie took a step toward him, and Shinon tensed. "I'm so stupid...I let you get hurt. You...there was so much blood all over you." The sniper tried to block the memories of pain that Gatrie's words evoked. "I'm so sorry..." The knight's voice cracked with strain, and Shinon looked up to find the man's eyes brimming with tears. Oh, fuck.

"I'm fine, Gatrie." Shinon had to turn his back on him, unable to keep his face expressionless. "All in a day's work, right?"

"But you almost died!" Gatrie actually shouted. Shinon ground his teeth.

"So, you made a mistake. At least it was just me and not someone really important to you..." Goddess, it hurt to speak those words.

"Don't say that!" Gatrie strode over to him, pulling the sniper around to face him. Shinon quickly forced his features into a picture of serenity. Inside, he was boiling. "Don't...please, Shinon..." The knight took him into a crushing hug. Shinon's mind flashed back to the forest, when Gatrie held him. It felt the same, but this time there was no pain, just the sensation of Gatrie's strong arms and torso. Shinon almost lost himself in it before remembering his resolve. There would be another Shana. He was sick of being jerked around. Gatrie had fucking left him to die. Shinon was NOT going to let Gatrie apologize and think everything was going to be okay. The anger boiled over, and for a moment Shinon lost control.

He forcibly pushed Gatrie away from him with one hand, and with the other punched the knight as hard as he could in the face. It caught his cheek, and was powerful enough to cause Gatrie to stumble backwards. Seeing it was cathartic for the sniper. "Don't EVER fucking touch me!" Shinon bellowed, his heart racing. He was overcome with blind fury, and took another threatening step toward Gatrie. The knight's blue eyes widened in fear or shock, Shinon was unsure which, and he held up his hands as if to ward the sniper off.

He would apologize again. Gatrie would just apologize again for hugging him, and whine about it. The sniper did not want to deal with it. Gatrie...Gatrie was not worth his time. Shinon glared daggers at the knight before fleeing the room, banging the door behind him. Shame colored his cheeks as he ran out of the compound into the forest, shame at himself for almost falling for Gatrie's stupid charisma again as well as shame for reacting the way he just had. It just..it just wasn't worth it. Shinon missed the apathy he had once had for everything and everyone. Everything was Gatrie's fault. The sniper leaned against a tree, fingers curling around the rough bark as he caught his breath. He was still not at his best, and the brief run had winded him. He heard a roaring in his ears, and closed his eyes, cursing Gatrie for his own weakness as well as for everything else.

"I hate this." Shinon said aloud to the empty forest. He hoped no one had seen him run out, or followed him. It didn't seem like anyone had seen, and even if they had...who cared enough to follow besides Rolf?

The sniper stood up straighter, his breathing returning to normal. His hand throbbed, and he frowned at the pain from punching Gatrie. That hadn't been his best decision, but he had been so overwhelmed. He simply could not deal with Gatrie, could not deal with anything...

There was a way to escape that, though, for a time. Shinon sighed and headed south, toward a traveler's inn that he frequented-and got thrown out of-quite often. He would show Rhys 'problems with alcohol.'

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TBC

Wow, this chapter was full of feelings. They're hard to write. I feel like I was redundant.

Reviews please!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4-Some Shinon/Rhys in this chapter, though it still may or may not be the final pairing. Hope you enjoy even if Rhys is not your thing.

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Shinon stared into his glass, breathing slowly into it. He liked the way it rippled when he did that, the surface of the amber liquid growing darker and lighter as it moved outward. Once he grew bored of this, he drank it down in almost a single gulp, and added the now empty glass to the steadily growing pile. He could no longer know how many there were simply by looking. He had to count them. He traced a finger around each one, counting slowly in his head. 7…8…9…

Someone bumped his chair, and the drunk stumbled away without apologizing. Shinon lost count, and turned around to glare at the man-or at least tried to. When he did, the world spun around him, and in the next moment, the bar was over his head. It was ugly on the underside, Shinon thought distantly. Stained.

"Hey, you." Someone leaned over him, seemingly out of nowhere. "I think you'd better eat something."

Shinon waved his hand at the man, trying to shove him away. His stomach roiled at the thought of food, and he lay his head down on the wooden floor. The man disappeared, and a short time later the archer felt strong arms around his shoulders.

"Hey…What're you doin'!" Shinon yelled, and he struggled to his feet just in time to be unceremoniously dumped outside the bar into the forest. As he fell into the leaves, the door closed behind him.

"Shome traveler's inn…dumping traveler'sh outshide…" Shinon groaned and lay still for a while, the world spinning around him. He was pretty sure people walked past him, but they didn't offer any help. Not that he would have let them had they tried. Besides, it wasn't too bad out here. Gatrie often…

He hiccupped, and groaned again. Gatrie was such a drunk. It was his fault Shinon drank all the time. And of course bars were where Gatrie met all his women. Stupid whores. Gatrie would never get anything better.

"At leasht… I'm not a whore." Shinon said aloud, to no one in particular. This statement cheering him, he sat up, the leaves crunching as he shifted his weight. They were a fine counterpoint to the whirling his movement produced. Used to this level of intoxication, Shinon stumbled forward, trusting his memory of the location of their stronghold to guide him there. He felt proud of himself when he managed to walk into only three trees as he wavered back in the dark.

A horse neighed shrilly as he entered the proximity of their base, and Shinon cursed loudly and nonsensically at it. He didn't know which horse it was, but it was probably the one he had ridden back. It would like to annoy him, the vicious beast. And what was a horse doing awake at this hour anyway? Shinon squinted through the gloom, trying to make out which of the four buildings in his fuzzy vision was the base and which one was the stable. His sight cleared as he swayed closer, the world spinning under his feet. The big one was the base. Of course.

It took him a few tries to find the doorhandle, but once he did he shoved the door open with all of his weight, so much so that it banged against the far wall with a tremendous clatter. Shinon fell onto his hands and knees in the entranceway, blinking in confusion. The torches were extinguished, and he could barely see the outline of the table. Damn Ike. Of course he wouldn't let a few torches stay lit for people who liked to stay out late…

Shinon's legs felt numb, and he had to figure out what position he needed to put them in before he could stand again. He thought he stood well, but after a few steps he crashed into a table, knocking off something that clattered loudly to the floor, and then as he went down he hit a chair. He ended up on his back, staring at a chair that had somehow flipped over him. A dull pain throbbed in his knees.

"Urgh…" Shinon gave up, closing his eyes. He would just sleep here. It was good enough. He convinced himself the chair was a sufficient blanket.

"Shinon…" Someone was calling his name. A familiar voice. Rhys's voice. He groaned in response.

"What're you want?" The archer slurred. Talking took effort.

"Um…I can get the chair off of you…" Shinon opened his eyes to see the healer looking down at him, holding a candle aloft. The light danced in Shinon's eyes, dizzying him, and he groaned again, turning his head away. The floor began to spin under his shoulders. He only half heard the scraping as Rhys moved the chair away.

"You've been drinking, haven't you?" Rhys asked him, kneeling next to the prone man.

"Shut up." Shinon closed his eyes. Maybe Rhys would go away.

Instead, the priest put his hand on Shinon's forehead, and then in his hair, pulling small strands of it. It felt weird, and the sniper's eyes flew open. "What?!"

Rhys smiled shakily, holding something up to Shinon's face that immediately diverged into two fuzzy shapes. "You have leaves in your hair."

Shinon tried to grab at them, and missed completely, his hand falling uselessly to his side. "I like leavesh."

"Um, I do too." Rhys replied. Shinon closed his eyes again, ignoring the priest. His body felt unimaginably heavy. He was tired, and wanted to sleep while the alcohol still had him feeling warm and pleasantly disoriented. He just wanted to feel the spinning floor.

"Shinon, please don't pass out." Rhys sounded concerned. Shinon silently willed him to go away, letting himself drift. He thought he had won when he heard the priest's soft footsteps recede, and he dozed lightly until ice cold water hit him in the face, splashing over his chest. His heart immediately began to race and all traces of sleepiness left him.

"What wash thatfor?!" Shinon actually sat up unaided, sputtering, trying to get his bearings as the world steadied and his clothing dripped. His pleasant warmth was completely gone, and the shock of the cold had restored some of his equilibrium. He glared hatefully at Rhys, the priest's outline stabilizing despite the dancing candle flame.

"I needed to wake you up." Rhys seemed sure of himself. "I'm taking you back to your room."

The part of Shinon that was reeling under the onslaught of the cold water told him this was a good idea. The fuzziness of the drink was beginning to return, however, and his unreliable reflexes and tired body told him to lie back down here. He merely stared at the priest until the other man grabbed Shinon's arm, hoisting the archer up and supporting him on one shoulder. Shinon was too shocked and too slowed by alcohol to mount any resistance, finding his feet under him by instinct.

"I'm stronger than I look, you know." Rhys told him. Had Shinon been sober, he would have noticed the healer's legs shaking under the strain. "C'mon, we're going to your room."

Rhys wasn't patronizing him, like Gatrie did when Shinon came back drunk. The priest sounded controlling, straightforward. It was annoying. And yet…the motion of Rhys's shoulders, his soft yet firm hand on his, and the constant contact between Shinon's body and the priests as he leaned on him…Shinon quite liked it. He had been resisting touch for so long; the sensation of this touch took him by surprise.

Shinon analyzed it as they made their way slowly toward the stairwell. It was different from what he imagined Gatrie would be like. Gatrie would be all muscle and power, directing Shinon's movements underneath him. Rhys felt…softer. The muscles were there, but his touch was so different. It was his hands, Shinon decided. Gatrie's hands would be rough, but Rhys's would not be.

"I like yer hands." Shinon said aloud as Rhys began helping him take the stairs. The priest's shoulders tensed.

"Um, that's nice. Put a foot on the stairs, C'mon."

"They're soft." The archer elaborated. He let his head droop a bit onto Rhys's shoulder. "A lot softer than Gatrie's."

Rhys nearly dropped him, and Shinon's world whirled crazily as he tried to support his own weight and stay near Rhys. "I-I see." The healer regained his balance, supporting Shinon a little less this time. "Focus on the stairs, Shinon. Not much further."

Shinon made his way slowly up the stairs, not letting go of Rhys's support. It took him a while, but the drunken sniper eventually realized that the priest was embarrassed. Something Shinon had said had embarrassed him. He thought hard about this as Rhys guided the sniper to his room, and scrutinized the priest. Rhys looked really good right then. He was breathing hard, his face flushed, and his shoulders were very warm. Shinon put his hand on Rhys's face, wanting to see if his face was warm too.

"Sh-Shinon?" Rhys didn't push him away, but his breathing hitched. "I-I thought you didn't like to be touched."

The impulse was too strong to be ignored. Shinon pressed himself closer to the priest, his body as close as he could make it. He could feel the man's form underneath his robes, slight and masculine, soft yet firm. He put his cheek against Rhys's face, and he felt the healer's warm breath. It felt really, really good. It had been too long since he had satisfied any of his urges, and Shinon moved against the smaller man, seeking pleasure.

"Shinon!" Rhys practically squeaked. The sniper took the opportunity to kiss the healer, sloppily, on the mouth. He tried to force his tongue in, and ended up licking Rhys's lips, mostly thwarted. The sniper hissed in frustration, and ground himself against the other man. He got a sense of satisfaction when he felt Rhys's body respond to him. The healer gasped, and Shinon got access, his thick tongue invading the orange haired man's mouth. He tasted good, and Shinon moaned into the kiss.

Rhys tried to push him away, and Shinon pushed back. The priest failed, and Shinon shoved him against the wall of his room, not letting up the assault on his mouth or body. The archer's tongue swept across the roof of the healer's small mouth, and he grabbed one of Rhys's hands. He wished Rhys would touch him with those soft hands, and the thought doubled his lust. He moved his hand downward, brushing Rhys's thigh.

Rhys pushed him away, much harder this time, and the drunken sniper lost his balance. He fell backwards, and Rhys took the opportunity to get away from the wall, his hands out as if warding the sniper off. His face was bright red, and he struggled to control his breathing. "Go to sleep, Shinon. You're…very drunk." He fled the room then, closing the door behind him hurriedly.

Shinon's ardor faded with the lack of stimulation, and he looked angrily at the closed door. His head fuzzy, he finally fixated on one thing-what the hell had he just done? That may not have been the best idea. He lay down on the floor, wishing it would spin again. He felt sick, and fell into a heavy, dreamless sleep.

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TBC

Reviews please!


	5. Chapter 5

Part 5.

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The pain in his head woke him. It was almost as bad as the previous day, although this time there was the added effect of nausea from overindulgence, and a wonderful black spot in the sniper's memory as to how he had gotten back to his room. The last thing he remembered was being knocked from his barstool…Or maybe he had fallen. Now he lay on the floor.

The sun shined into his window cheerily, and Shinon wanted to shoot it out of the sky. It couldn't be very late, or the sun would be higher by now. The light made his nausea worse, and the sniper rolled into a sitting position, hoping against hope that his stomach would settle soon. He sat there for a while before getting to his feet, doing his best to ignore the pain in his head. This he could deal with. He had dealt with it before.

He changed his clothes, and retied his hair, moving robotically through the motions of making himself presentable. He wished he could remember how he had made it back the night before. He felt like it was important for once. Could it have been Gatrie? The thought chilled him, and his stomach threatened rebellion. But no…the knight wouldn't have left him on the floor. In the past, Gatrie had always put him to bed, and had even checked on him the next morning.

Shinon shook his head, clearing out thoughts of Gatrie and misplaced tenderness. It meant nothing. He couldn't worry about that anymore. He just needed to get over it. Move on. Gatrie would never love him.

Shinon groaned, sitting on his bed and putting his aching head in his hands. Where had that word come from? Gatrie didn't love anything. I don't love anything! Shinon thought angrily. He didn't love Gatrie! His sense of betrayal was just from the loss of friendship and from sexual frustration. That must be it.

The excuse sounded weak even in his head. Shinon stood up and grabbed his bow, heading out to the practice yard. Nothing fixed a hangover like working through it.

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"Uncle Shinon!" The sniper suppressed a wince as the boy's shrill voice sent a bolt of pain through his head, and his stomach dropped sickeningly. Only a half hour into target practice and the mite had spotted him. No one else in the camp would be up at this hour, and it was always Rolf's favorite time to practice. Shinon had hoped the kid would spare him for once, but he couldn't think of a logical reason to send Rolf away when Shinon was obviously already out shooting, and he couldn't take his anger out on a child. Maybe he could get through it without much talking.

"Set up another target. Go for distance today. You ever want to be a marksman, you'd better get distance." With that, Shinon went back to his own practice, hoping Rolf would be so absorbed that he wouldn't make inane conversation like he usually did.

No such luck. "Uncle Shinon, I didn't see you yesterday." The boy obviously meant it as a question.

"I was busy."

"Where?"

"None of your business. Focus!" Shinon fired his own arrow, hitting the target dead center as an example. Rolf followed suit, although his arrow strayed off a bit, hitting the green. The boy frowned in concentration, and Shinon thought he was spared further annoyance until Rolf spoke up again, on a completely new topic.

"What's a whore?" The older sniper narrowly avoided misfiring. Damnit. Apparently Oscar hadn't answered the question to the kid's satisfaction. He hoped Rolf wasn't asking again because someone had told him that's where Shinon had been last night. He was nowhere near that desperate.

He was saved from having to answer by the arrival of Boyd, who set up his own target and began throwing hand axes at it. Rolf bit his lip, presumably to keep from asking more stupid questions. Shinon didn't want anyone else in the camp to know he had trained the kid. Let Boyd think they had happened to train at the same time, not necessarily together.

By the time Oscar called them all in for breakfast, Shinon's stomach had settled down and his head, though not necessarily without pain, felt clearer. He began remembering some events of the previous night, mainly centered on him lying outside the inn after being thrown out. Something about the leaves bothered him, and he wished he could remember what it was.

Shinon served himself of the breakfast Oscar had laid out for them, taking his usual seat at the table nearest the door. A flash of memory returned as he remembered knocking over one of the chairs the night before. He had lain on the floor, too.

Rhys walked by him then, and Shinon caught the healer's eyes. Rhys flushed crimson and looked down at the floor, hurrying away from the sniper. Oh, Goddess. The memory came back, of Rhys against the wall, his body pressed against Shinon's, the healer blushing and panting, and his mouth…

Shinon pushed his food away, standing up hurriedly and practically running to the stairs up to his room. He locked the door behind him, struggling to calm down. He wished he had been drunker so he wouldn't have remembered…he wished he had been drunker so he would have passed out good and early and not have tried to molest Rhys!

It was because of Gatrie, Shinon told himself. The knight had him so angry that he couldn't think clearly. Shinon's fingers itched, and he wished he could go out shooting again to clear his head. But leaving breakfast early had probably already caused questions, and he didn't want to compound them.

And just as he had thought, there came a knock at his door. "Shinon?" Oscar's voice. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Shinon yelled through the door. Why had Oscar come upstairs, of all people? The sniper was half disappointed Rhys hadn't come to check on him, and immediately cursed himself for even thinking that.

"I think Rhys is worried." At this Shinon nearly cursed aloud. "Gatrie too." This time Shinon did.

"I don't fucking care! Leave me alone!" There was silence from the other side of the door, and then receding footsteps. Finally.

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Despite desires to the contrary, Shinon couldn't spend the entire day in his room. He headed down to the armory to indulge in another of his talents-making bows. It wasn't quite as relaxing as shooting, however, and his mind often wandered to strange places while he worked.

He set up a spot in the corner to craft, ignoring the developing hunger pangs. The hangover had worn off, at least.

Shinon carved the wood of the new bow carefully, being careful not to cause a flaw that would cause the bow to snap before he could get any use out of it. He had only caused that to happen once. The bow had exploded in his hands, flinging splinters of wood everywhere, and it was not a mistake he would ever repeat. He despaired teaching the subtle art to Rolf. He wondered if the brat would ever learn subtlety, in any respect.

Shinon moved on to the arrows for his new bow, considering what to use for the fletching. He was short on feathers, and made a mental note to go and collect some later. Maybe he could make Rolf do it.

Ike came banging in to the armory, obnoxious as usual. He gave Shinon a passing glance, looked almost as if he would say something, and then seemingly thought better of it. Shinon rolled his eyes and went back to his work, hoping Ike would trip onto the iron sword he had just taken. That would just be funny, and it was the first cheering thought Shinon had all day.

The cheer vanished only a few minutes later when Gatrie came into the armory, and not for a weapon. "Shinon!" The knight exclaimed. He was awfully cheerful, and it was an odd contrast with the last time Shinon had seen him. "Why'd you leave breakfast?"

Why the hell was Gatrie so happy? It galled the sniper, and he put an arrow down before he snapped it out of frustration. He wanted Gatrie to be upset, to be guilty, not jubilant as always. Why should Shinon be the only one to suffer?

"I wasn't hungry." He lied. He tried to put thoughts of Rhys, of an indecent Rhys, out of his head.

"Do you…do you want to train? With me, I mean." Shinon narrowed his eyes. How would that work? Although he did relish the idea of shooting the man.

When Shinon didn't answer immediately, Gatrie babbled on. "I want to get good with javelins, and Oscar isn't here, and I figured no one is as good at distance stuff as you, so you could help." He looked at Shinon apprehensively, and through the somewhat dark room, Shinon could see a small purplish bruise on the knight's cheek. His anger faded somewhat at the memory of his loss of control. Upon closer inspection, he could see that Gatrie was not as cheerful as he seemed. The knight held himself tensely, and his smile did not quite reach his eyes.

"Sure." He said in a monotone, putting his new bow and unfinished arrows away. He wondered if he and Gatrie would ever be as close as they had been before the battle. He despaired of them ever being closer.

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His body, however, apparently did not. Shinon found that he had to think of something, anything, other than the well muscled and beautiful blond man as the knight tried again to hit the target dead center, his shoulders and biceps flexing as he lifted the javelin for another throw. Gatrie was raw masculinity, and it attracted Shinon as it always had, at least physically. Shinon had to remind himself again and again of Gatrie's stupidity, of Shana, and of his betrayal, trying to avoid embarrassment. His frustration was getting out of hand.

"No." Shinon had no idea how to correct Gatrie's form, but he could at least pick out of the obvious, and it gave him something to focus on besides his own desire. "Start the throw from further back, and don't let the tip drop before you start throwing." Gatrie listened, and threw the javelin again-this time it hit the target, though nowhere near the center. Shinon sighed. At least it was some improvement. He had tried to explain why 45 degrees always yielded the best distance, but Gatrie had only stared at him without comprehension until Shinon had given up.

"That was good, try it again." Shinon wished Oscar had been around to help Gatrie, but apparently he and Titania had gone off on some errand. The compound seemed rather subdued, or maybe it was just his mood. Every time he talked to Gatrie now, he couldn't quite summon up any emotion. There was a rift between them, and Shinon was unwilling to try and repair it. His anger had begun to fade, but he didn't think he could ever trust Gatrie again.

"Shinon?" Gatrie interrupted his thoughts. "Can you show me the degree thing again?"

Shinon picked up his bow and fired an arrow as far as he could. It came down perfectly, so far away as to be almost invisible, and Gatrie stared at it like a cow. "It's the starting position, really. Strength doesn't matter if you don't begin from the correct…angle." Rhys had watched the arrow fly too, and Shinon ground his teeth as the healer approached them. He had no idea what he was supposed to do, and considered fleeing.

Rhys looked as discomfited as Shinon felt. He wrung his hands randomly, and settled them by clasping them together. Shinon was left wondering why he was so fascinated by them, and moved his gaze to the healer's neck. It was pale and…Goddamnit, his hair! There was nothing exciting about his ridiculous orange hair. Shinon grew angry at his own reaction. He wasn't even drunk this time!

"Shinon, can I talk to you?" Rhys practically whispered, and then blushed. Stupid fool. Even Gatrie picked up on the tension, and looked from one man to the other, confused.

"What could you possibly have to talk about?" Shinon snapped.

Rhys nearly jumped in surprise. "Um, last night I mean…"

"I don't really remember anything. Did I break something?" Shinon spit the lie, and even Gatrie looked surprised at his vehemence.

Rhys stared at him with wide eyes, obviously shocked by the information. His cheeks were still pink. "You don't remember?"

"Remember what?" Shinon hissed. "If it's so Goddessdamned important"-

"No, no…It's not. Um…Are you going to help with preparations for…well, bye." Rhys hurried away, almost as quickly as he had fled last night. Shinon frowned and turned back to Gatrie, who was staring at him with disbelief.

"Are you sick?" He asked finally. "From the injury?" Gatrie began to move toward Shinon, his face a mask of concern and reemerging guilt. Shinon had to nip that thought immediately.

"No! I just went to the bar and had a good time. Little priest can't deal with that." Shinon watched Rhys's retreating back until he disappeared into the compound. He felt a stab of guilt, and then buried it. "What preparations was he talking about?"

"Hm? Oh! At breakfast today Ike said that some of the knights of Crimea are going to visit. Some of the laguz, too."

Shinon huffed in annoyance. "Subhumans? And the knights? For what?"

Gatrie wilted in the face of Shinon's disdain. "I don't know…For fun, I guess. I hope Lady Astrid is there." He smiled again at the thought, and Shinon cruelly imagined punching the smile off the stupid man's face. He wasn't going to listen to any more of it and risk hearing Gatrie's adoration, and picked up his bow.

"I'm going to rest." He said curtly, and shoved Gatrie forcefully away when the other man tried to follow.

"Shinon?" The archer could feel Gatrie's big dumb eyes on his back as he walked away, and his face inexplicably burned with shame. Perhaps he hadn't really gotten over it, and began to doubt he ever would.

--------------------------------------------------

One thing that's always bugged me about fire emblem-how can you have an iron or steel bow? Bows need to be made out of wood by necessity, because they need flexibility. Unless they mean the arrows, which makes a bit more sense.

Oh well. Reviews please! Next chapter may be the last, I'm not sure.


	6. Chapter 6

At the last moment, Shinon turned away from the compound and headed toward the forest. If he couldn't shoot targets without Gatrie's incessant presence, then he could at least shoot meat for dinner. Especially if they might be feeding subhumans. He told himself he was not avoiding Rhys, but his inner protestations sounded hollow.

The archer stalked the forest trail, forcefully forgetting his worries about knights and healers and paying particular attention to the placement of each foot. Hunting was different than fighting. In war, he didn't bother concealing himself; energy was better spent reacting to his opponent. Besides, he always had someone to hide behind. When he hunted, his body was as tense as his bowstring, always alert for something to hit. There was no fear in it, no anticipation of pain if another blow landed, simply a constant vigilance. Walking through the forest as a predator gave him a unique appreciation for it.

And then the reward-a fat rabbit, munching grass lazily. The creature had not noticed him, or if it had, it was too stupid to run away. Shinon deftly knocked his bow and drew the arrow back, sighting the rabbit. His strong fingers loosed their grip, and the arrow flew.

It hit the rabbit straight on, and the creature flopped weakly for far too long. Shinon felt a rising nausea as a memory of his own injury-the spear through his lung, the coughing-was elicited by watching the animal. Finally, the creature lay mercifully dead, and Shinon walked over and collected it, pulling the arrow out and wiping it on the grass. It had not broken.

His desire to hunt was somewhat blunted, but one rabbit would not be enough for a meal, especially if they were entertaining guests. Subhumans and the Crimean Knights. That meant Oscar's loud competitive friend, and perhaps the pink haired gambler...he was fun, sometimes, despite being horribly ugly. Their captain was a tightass, though, and Shinon decided to avoid him. He couldn't remember the names of the subhumans, and didn't really care.

The sky darkened as Shinon hunted slowly, methodically acquiring rabbits and one pheasant for dinner. He was at least able to clear his mind, and he didn't even feel the need to drink at the end of the day, despite the rough beginning. He enjoyed being left alone like this, and each excursion like this one reinforced that fact. He didn't need the mercenaries, he thought. He didn't need Rhys, and he especially didn't need Gatrie. People were simply bothersome. Even as he thought this, however, he was headed back to the compound, meat slung over one shoulder for their dinner.

The only person in the kitchen was Mist, who had her back to him and was chopping what looked to be vegetables. Oh well. She could cook, right? He dropped the dead animals onto the counter in front of her. "You cooking?" He didn't wait for a response, and left the kitchen before the shocked Mist could recover. Once he was halfway down the hallway, he heard a shriek. He decided to ignore it, and headed to the common room.

That was a mistake, and Shinon's calm was almost immediately shattered. Gatrie was sitting down and rubbing some oil on his ankles, presumably to ease muscle aches. Mia was sitting with Boyd and Rolf, and the two brothers were arguing about the rules of some dicing game. Rhys sat in the corner, watching the two play and wincing whenever Boyd's voice got particularly loud. He met Shinon's eyes, and the sniper quickly looked to the dice game. Apparently Boyd thought five ones was a winning roll.

"That's not true!" Gatrie protested from across the room. "Ones are bad! Right, Shinon?"

"I told you!" Rolf crowed triumphantly. "I have more points!"

The sniper wanted to sit down, but he didn't want to sit next to Gatrie, or next to the loud and obnoxious Boyd. He contented himself with leaning against the wall, closing his eyes and trying to bring back some of the contentment he had felt in the forest. Why had he come back again?

"When is everyone getting here?" Mia asked, swiftly stealing the dice and throwing them. Two sixes. Boyd protested, but didn't try to take them.

"When Oscar and Titania get back." Gatrie said helpfully. Shinon rolled his eyes.

"I know that!" Mia said. "But when? They've been gone a while."

"They're meeting the knights at the border. The laguz will come on their own, probably by nightfall. It won't be long." Shinon was amazed that Rhys's soft voice could be heard in this room. People always seemed to be quieter when the healer spoke.

Shinon wanted to ask why their idiot commander thought it was a good idea to invite subhumans to their compound, but held his tongue. Maybe they'd feed them the horse. What was the occasion, anyway? It hadn't been long since the war. And where was everyone staying? He wished he hadn't missed breakfast. Not feeling particularly invited, Shinon left the common area, and headed up the stairs to his room. He wanted to plan the structure of a new type of bow. Anything for a distraction.

Of course, he needed paper for that. The sniper headed to the small library that Greil had been so fond of, and was greeted with the unfavorable face of Soren in the doorway. Shinon would have simply pushed past the obnoxious little creature, had the mage not spoken.

"You still haven't told me how you were injured."

Shinon's lip curled in distaste, and his footsteps slowed. He wasn't going to satisfy the mage with any sort of answer.

"I talked to Gatrie while you were out." Shinon froze. "He says it was his fault. I'm not inclined to believe him." Of course not. Gatrie could do no wrong. It was always lazy, drunk, crude Shinon with the problem. This was a challenge.

"Oh really? So you admit it was your own incompetence?" Shinon faced the mage now, eyes flashing dangerously. The fingers on his right hand twitched as if releasing an imaginary bow string.

Soren stared him down coolly. "I noticed Gatrie has a bruise on his face."

"Since when do you notice anything except Ikey and your books?" Shinon spit back.

"I also spoke to Rhys." Soren said, unfazed at Shinon's rage. Shinon barely kept himself from striking the man to keep him from speaking. "He says you were so drunk you couldn't stand last night. How often does that occur?"

"What do you care?" What was Soren getting at?

"If you can't keep your personal relationships out of the battlefield, I won't bring you into one." The mage stated. Shinon blanched, and then flushed with shame and anger.

"You're a fucking moron." He said viciously. "Shut the fuck up." Shinon lapsed into the language usually reserved when he discussed Ike. "All you're fucking good for is making friends with subhumans and sucking little Ikey's cock. You're a hideous little shit and it's no wonder not even Gatrie likes you." Shinon took a step forward, intent on the attack in order to avoid how Soren had shamed him. "You disgust everyone you meet."

The mage gave no ground. "Look at yourself. A drunken fool, the laugh of the company. The one mistake Ike made was taking you back. I at least know we don't need you. Why are you here, anyway? Your so called best friend abandoned you in battle, didn't he?" Soren spoke plainly.

Soren had known. "Fuck you." Shinon spat, but his heart wasn't in it. It's not true, he tried to tell himself. But it was. Hadn't he been thinking there was little for him here, only a few hours ago? Gatrie didn't need him. Rhys…He wasn't worthy of Rhys.

"The guests will be here soon. At least try to be presentable." Soren turned on his heel and strolled away. Shinon wanted to strike back, to regain something, but there was nothing to regain. He had been baited and lost. Making a bow suddenly didn't seem so important. Shinon walked in a daze to his room, locking the door behind him.

He wouldn't leave the company, not again. He had nowhere to go. But he also didn't feel any desire to participate in the stupid little party Ike was throwing. No one would miss him anyway. And he didn't care, damnit! It was all this giving a crap about other people that had gotten him into this mess. He didn't need anyone.

Hoofbeats came from outside, and Shinon went to the window. Oscar and Kieran rode in underneath the window toward the stables, the red armored paladin whooping about "one day beating the squinty one!" Geoffrey rode in soon after with Titania and Astrid, and Makalov trailed behind.

The little procession done with, Shinon left the window. He didn't know what to do with himself. Usually he and Gatrie would be looting alcohol from the storeroom at this time, or he would be listening to the knight talk about the war and how many pretty girls he'd seen. He hated it, but he had to admit, he hated being alone in his room like this more.

Shinon lay down on his bed, closing his eyes and willing himself to not think. He could hear laughter downstairs, and someone banging on a table. Stupid. He rolled over and put his pillow over his head, and pretended he wasn't lonely.

TBC

I've decided to make this Shinon/Rhys, so future chapters will be geared towards that. Not sure how many more chapters there will be.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The creaking of a door woke him, and he sat up, instinctively reaching for a bow that was not there. Reflexes honed by the long travels in war relaxed, and Shinon blearily peered through the gloom at the doorframe. Who was bothering him now?

"Whaoh…Shorry, didn't know thish wash a door." Someone slurred from outside.

Shinon raised an eyebrow and rolled out of bed, falling lightly onto his feet. "Who's there?" Obviously some drunk from the party Ike was throwing, though how the man had wandered up the stairs unnoticed escaped the archer.

"Have you sheen Marshia?" The man asked, and then stumbled into the doorframe, hit his head on the side, and passed out halfway in the hallway and halfway into Shinon's room. The archer groaned. This was not how he had wanted to be woken up. He had hoped he would sleep through the party, and wake up when everyone was gone.

He wandered out into the hallway, getting a good look at the man on the floor. The pink haired one…Wasn't he a knight of Crimea? The one who gambled all the time? And his sister was Marshia…Marcia, the Pegasus knight. Shinon wrinkled his nose in disgust at the sight of the man. Not only was he ugly, he reeked of alcohol and was drooling on the floor. Shinon hoped that he didn't look that bad when he drank, and spoke a silent apology to Rhys for putting him through this. Not that he'd stop drinking completely, of course. Rhys didn't have to help him.

And Shinon felt no compunction to help this one. Getting him out of his room, though…that was another matter. The archer grabbed the man's feet and dragged him the rest of the way out of his room, straining under the dead weight.

"Um…is he okay?" A soft voice spoke, and Shinon set his expression to one of neutrality. He looked over at Rhys, who had just turned the corner and was staring rather red faced at Shinon.

"Just drunk." Shinon said with some hostility toward the unconscious man.

"Oh, um…" Rhys didn't seem to know what to do. "I'll stay with him…can you get General Geoffrey? Unless you..um…were.."

Shinon stepped over the still form. "I'll get him." He didn't know why Rhys was acting so much more flustered than usual, and told himself not to care. But what if the little priest had been drinking too? For some reason, that idea excited Shinon, and he peered out of the corner of his eye at the priest as he passed by him. It didn't look that way, though-Rhys seemed intent on ignoring him. Well, fine. If Rhys didn't think Shinon worth his time, the archer wouldn't care. Soren's words echoed, and the archer banished them. He didn't care about drunks falling into his room, so why should Rhys' opinion matter? Even if he did look rather good with a blush that spread all the way to his usually pale neck…

Shinon walked down the stairs, smoothing his rumpled clothing. From what he could remember, Geoffrey was the tall one with blue hair. What was he supposed to tell him? That his subordinate passed out drunk in the hallway? What was he going to do about it besides punish him? A brief survey of the common room didn't reveal the blue haired paladin, and there were surprisingly few people here. It was obviously late, and those who did remain looked to be either intoxicated or exhausted.

A loud shout interrupted Shinon's thoughts. "HAHA! You squinty coward! You fail to the prowess of the great knight Kieran-NO! How can you flip THAT MANY COINS!?" Apparently the dicing table from before was now playing host to a different sort of game, involving copper pieces being tossed into mugs of ale. Shinon was sorely tempted. He had seen this game played before, and it always ended well for everyone, if a bit hazy. Shinon grabbed a mug off the table, ignoring Boyd's half hearted protest. The ale wasn't great, but it satisfied Shinon's sudden craving. He did not escape the table, however, without someone else noticing him.

"You! You cannot drink! YOU HAVE NOT LOST YET!" The auburn haired man who was currently screaming at him was red in the face, either from drink or from the effort it took to yell at that volume. Oscar put a restraining hand on the man's shoulder, smiling apologetically at Shinon.

"It's okay, Kieran, it's Boyd's turn now."

Forgotten, Shinon turned away, drinking slowly. He was in no hurry to get that plastered, and wanted to avoid it for tonight, the memory of his hangover still fresh. Besides, Rhys was alone with a passed out drunk. That couldn't be good.

Shinon avoided the corner of the room, where a red caped mage spoke with a very large cat subhuman. The only subhuman Shinon had ever gotten along with was Janaff, and he didn't see any of the hawks here. It was a shame. Mia was conversing rapidly with Lethe on the couch-something about training.

"Has anyone seen Makalov?" A girl's voice piped, and Shinon turned to see a pink haired girl standing in the middle of the room, looking around with a worried expression. That might be his name.

"Does he have hideous pink hair?" He asked her nonchalantly, sipping his drink. She frowned at him.

"Yes-he's an ingrate! He lost the coin game and then vanished."

"He passed out upstairs in the hallway."

"Oh, that clod!" She stomped her foot on the ground. "How much money did he waste this time!?" She demanded of Shinon.

"How should I know?"

"Well, you said you knew where he was!"

"Shinon! You're talking to a girl! But it's not polite to argue with a lady." Gatrie appeared out of the doorway that led to the kitchen, swooping up next to him. "What's your name?" He leaned toward the pink haired girl, and even Shinon, who was not directly facing the knight, could smell the alcohol on his breath. In this context, he couldn't even appreciate Gatrie's closeness-the knight's attention was firmly somewhere else. Shinon narrowed his eyes.

"She's not a lady, she's a knight."

"What do you need, pretty lady?" Gatrie asked her, ignoring Shinon.

"I'm looking for my brother…I think he said he was upstairs. Bye!" The girl ran off, and Shinon wished to follow. Unfortunately, Gatrie didn't let him.

"Aww…she was good looking, wasn't she?" Gatrie asked him. Shinon rolled his eyes. It couldn't be helped. Nothing had really changed, and it probably never would. He could not have the knight the way he wanted, and it was time to accept it. He had wasted enough time. Shinon drained the rest of his drink, and handed the empty glass to Gatrie. Goddess, it hurt to admit to himself, but he didn't have any more energy to spend on it. He felt as drained as the glass.

"Why don't you go find Astrid?" Shinon told Gatrie, nudging him away.

"That's a good idea! You're so smart, Shinon." Gatrie wobbled away, in search of the dark haired paladin. Shinon didn't let himself watch the knight, and headed toward the stairs. Perhaps Rhys would be satisfied with Makalov's sister helping instead of Goefrrey. Shinon didn't feel like getting Makalov in trouble. As annoying as the situation was, Shinon understood the desire to be loose sometimes. He had felt it often enough the last few days.

"Makalov! You lout! Wake up!" Shinon was greeted with the sight of the pink haired girl stomping on her brother to rouse him, while Rhys flailed his arms off the side in silent protest.

"Merghlflahg…" Shinon didn't know if Makalov was waking up or just snoring. The girl kicked him harder.

"Ouch! Wha…"

"Oh…" Rhys said out loud, putting his hand to his mouth in sympathy.

"Get up! You're going to the stables where you belong!" Shinon watched in shock and no small amount of appreciation as the small girl hoisted her brother to his feet and half dragged him back down the stairs. Rhys watched as well, until the siblings were out of sight. She didn't even thank Shinon, too intent on getting her brother out of there.

"Hm." Shinon couldn't really think of much else to say. He found it rather amusing, if scarily familiar.

"Um…Do you remember anything?" Rhys spoke softly. Shinon turned to stare at the smaller man, who had his eyes fixed firmly on the floor. "That didn't...jog your memory?"

"I wasn't that bad off, was I?" Shinon found himself answering. This was so awkward; he hated it. Why hadn't Gatrie helped him when he was drunk? Of course, Gatrie couldn't be relied on. Shinon felt the betrayal keenly again; Gatrie couldn't be relied on for anything anymore. He wasn't that kind of friend.

"No! You were…more active." Shinon could see a blush creeping up Rhys' neck, and his desire to get out of the situation was softened by sudden appreciation for the sight. Could Rhys have liked it?

"Oh really?" He tried to sound bored. In truth, he was intrigued. Rhys hadn't told Soren about the sexual attempts-the slimy mage would have definitely mentioned them otherwise. Shinon couldn't place why Rhys seemed so intent on talking about it, though. If he was a priest, why didn't he just pray for forgiveness and get over it? The other man's morals confused the archer.

"You, um, mentioned Gatrie." Shinon's thoughts halted and changed tracks. Oh, this wasn't good. He didn't remember that part. What had he said? "His hands." Shinon drew a blank.

"What?" He said, honestly incredulous.

"You said Gatrie's hands were rough." Rhys blurted out, as if admitting that Shinon had said he killed kittens and ate them for dinner. The archer didn't know how to react. Rhys surely couldn't think…

"His hands are rough. He's a knight." Shinon answered, hoping he sounded sufficiently confused. He had practically molested this man, and the priest was worried about Shinon's opinion of Gatrie's hands? There was something missing here. Shinon tried to remember what else he may have said.

"You said that…My hands were soft. Not like Gatrie's. Then you…" Rhys trailed off, obviously unable to tell Shinon what had happened next. Guilt rose in the archer's chest, and suddenly he understood. Rhys thought that Shinon was in a relationship with Gatrie. It would have been hilarious, if it weren't so painful at this moment. He did-no, he had wanted that. Not anymore.

"Then I what?" Shinon said, with more anger than he had intended. Rhys couldn't think that any longer. Shinon would not allow it.

"You…you approached me." That was an interesting way to put it. Shinon didn't respond. If Rhys wanted to talk about this, he would have to bring it to light himself. "You kissed me." Rhys finished miserably, after an awkward silence. "You…touched me." He said the last so quietly that Shinon barely heard him. The archer cursed his own stupidity when he felt his face heat up.

"What does Gatrie have to do with that?" It was a nasty thing to say, but Shinon had to say it. Whatever came about because of this, Shinon didn't want Gatrie involved.

"He…you're friends." Rhys looked at him sadly. The word "friends" was an obvious question.

"Yes, friends. Nothing else." Shinon wanted this conversation to end. Not knowing Rhys' motives was incredibly frustrating, as was the unintentional reminder of something Shinon knew he could never have.

"Oh…" Rhys was quiet.

"What?" Shinon asked, annoyed. He couldn't take the man's silence. Why wasn't Rhys angry? Shinon certainly was. This whole situation was getting out of his control, and the archer didn't like that. He could deal with it, but he didn't like it.

"Why did you do it?" Rhys asked him, for once looking him straight in the eye.

"I was drunk." Shinon answered, too quickly. He couldn't think quickly enough to formulate a more suitable answer. He couldn't even apologize. He felt terrible, and he couldn't say it.

"Oh." Rhys said, and he stood quietly before perking up suddenly. "It's ok. I forgive you."

Shinon didn't have a chance to speak before the healer hurried past him, down the stairs. The archer had no inclination to follow. Rhys forgave him? That easily? And for the act itself, the drunkenness, or all of it? Absurdly, Shinon felt he needed a drink, and knew it wouldn't be a good idea. Instead of the pain he had felt from acknowledging Gatrie's disinterest, now he was just confused. Shinon had been certain that Rhys would be angry, or hurt, or would at least do something to let Shinon know that he had done something terrible. But forgive him? Shinon couldn't understand it. He needed to clear his head, and headed to the library. It didn't matter to Shinon how late it was. Now would be a good time to design that new bow.

TBC

My update schedule is really erratic...oh well.

Review please!


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